I have officially turned into the KISSY MONSTER! I just can't keep my lips off of my sweet little man. He is just so soft and cuddly, my lips are drawn to his forehead, lips, cheeks, hands (especially when he's rubbing my chest while nursing), and any other nook I come across. As I reread the previous sentence, it seems like I am strangly intimate with my little three almost four month old, but nothing is strange about it...it all seems so right. I have never been a big kisser with anyone; my parents, aunts, uncles, grandparents, boyfriends (well, Dave was my only boyfriend so I guess the better word would be husband) husband, or anyone else who may want to pucker up and lay one on me. It's almost as a force of love explodes out of me into a kiss that happens to land on his angelic skin.
Also, as I look at Vaughn lately, I finally feel that amazingly strong bond I've read or heard about. When he was born, I loved him but not like I do now. Now, I just want to scream in the street, "I LOVE MY BABY VAUGHN!!!" This feeling of love is overwhelming. As he lays in my arms, I look down to feel this paralyzing feeling of love, which often conjures a few tears. When I first started to nurse, I did it just because it is nutritionally important for Vaughn. Lately, I feel that bond. I have a feeling I'm going to have a harder time giving it up than he will.
As I was thinking about how to end this entry, Louis Armstrong is singing in the background:
...I hear babies cry
I watch them grow
They'll learn much more
than I'll ever know
And I think to myself...
What a wonderful world!
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